We have been married for 21 years and for the last couple of years our sex life and marriage is going from bad to worse. Despite my different attempts, all have seemed futile and with no positive result. Last year for our 20 th anniversary I took her to Venice on holiday. I was looking forward and though that hey this will create some bond. But we spent more time buying souvenirs for our children and in-laws than enjoying the time we had together. She seems to be happy in her comfort zone and that is it. I have tried everything and never miss a birthday/anniversary/Christmas, but still she seems to be happy without me. She does not even care when I go to the doctor and is more interested in the well being of the kids than mine. Whatever I do she always finds something to complain. This year I asked her to go to a restaurant she surely likes that is on the expensive side and since it is on the weekend, I thought that maybe we should go by ourselves. But guess what....she wanted to go for lunch together rather than on ourselves in the evening. Cause I am in love, I try to be accomodating as much as possible and so accepted by feel really bad for the fact that my wife seems not to be comfortable with me. This is not the first time and that is why I am suspecting this. Last thing why I chose this thread. I have recently noticed that while watching tv on the couch, she places her hand between her legs and moves her fingers and also caresses her thighs on the underneath and sides in a sensual way. I cannot say what she does with her fingers as sitting near her is not the ideal position to stay, but considering that we have not have sex for the last 2 months, I can only wonder that it is only one thing. I cannot ask her as she is very conservative and a discussion with her end always in an argument. Fell free to ask more info if you need any detail to help me understand how to discuss this as it is really bothering me now.