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 Your Dreams
Are you convinced your dreams are trying to tell you something? If you think there's a message hidden in your dreams then Charmaine may be able to help you interpret it. She provides dream analysis for a number of newspapers and magazines and is now helping Aphrodite's readers understand their dreams. You can email Charmaine for help and read her weekly interpretations here.
Baby On The Way?
6 August, 2008
Q. My boyfriend told me that he had a dream last night that he was at the mall with one of his friends and they saw a couple of other friends who had kids with them. They got to talking and my boyfriend said he told them that "my girlfriend is 8 months pregnant!" What does this dream mean? Please help!
A. Don't panic. It doesn't mean you are, though you could be. Only you know if you have been using contraception and whether you are ready for kids at this stage of your life. If anything, this dream indicates your boyfriend's desire for children rather than your own. I think you should tell him what you saw and what he said. Watch his reaction. The two of you need to use this dream to start a conversation about your relationship and its future. If you're worried about getting pregnant then this dream reflects that feeling. Whichever it is, sort it out.
Breakup Unresolved
23 July, 2008
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago, and it seems like in my dreams he wants me back. The break up was heart-breaking, so to have dreams about my ex was normal to me, but to have dreams about him searching for me was weird. The first dream I had about him was when we were on a train. My ex was telling me that he wanted to reconcile, because he made a mistake. In this first dream, I felt like I can see the word "reconcile." The second dream was more detailed. In my second dream, I moved on with my life. I met this guy, and I wasn't interested in him, but I said to myself, hey, just go for it. I'm leaving out the door and guess who shows up, my ex. My ex-boyfriend's face looked sad and he told me that he wanted to talk. My ex told me that he wanted to reconcile and that he made a mistake. Once my ex told me that he wanted to reconcile, my cell phone started to vibrate. The new guy was the one that was calling me. I looked at my cell phone, then looked at my ex, then I looked at my cell phone again and the dream was over. I didn't even get to decide who I was going to choose, but ever since I had those dreams, I continue to have dreams where me and my ex are together and were working out our problems and getting back into the groove of things. Each dream feels so real, and it feels like a storyline. Can you please give me insight into what this is all about?
A. Some dreams are so vivid, we're sure they're real when we wake. Also, it can seem that we're watching the action while living it out at the same time, for instance, when you say you saw the word "reconcile." I don't know if you are meant to go back with your ex but the dreams are occurring because it's only a month since you broke up. It takes a while to resolve feelings when a relationship ends. If we don't honour these emotions, dreams will often bring them out for us. This type of dream can represent wishful thinking but in yours, I think it has more to do with the rawness of your heartbreak. Give it time. If you are meant to reconcile, it'll happen whether or not you push it. Acceptance softens the intensity of our dreams, so try that.
Abuse Nightmare
9 July, 2008
Q. I need help understanding this dream! When I was little, my real dad would abuse my mom, me and my older sister. For the last 3 days straight, I have had this dream that he was abusing us again and it was just like before. I notice that we are always in the same place but there are new people in it! Does this mean anything? Can you interpret this? I am terrified about everything now.
A. Childhood abuse stays with us long into adulthood. Even 40 years later, it can be lying dormant and then appear in unexpected ways, as in dreams. Can you think of anything at all that might've triggered this dream over the last few days? Have you thought/talked about the abuse or been reminded about it in some way? The new people in the cast of your dream are simply your subconscious mind's way of bringing the events into the present context so you can deal with them. It doesn't mean it's going to happen again or anything else bad. So, please stop being scared. You are a strong grown-up now and no longer need to fear your father but it's important to put all this into the past or you'll continue to be haunted by it. If you haven't already, do seek professional help.
Car Crash
25 June, 2008
Q. I keep having this recurring dream of my mom being in a car crash on this particular, quite dangerous roundabout in town and she dies. She's either in a red car or crashed into by a red car. I'm watching from above, but I'm not actually there. When I look to the roof of the red car, there's an angel hovering above and she tells me that this will actually happen and my mom will die, if I don't stop waiting for my boyfriend to come back from Canada. I don't want to end things with my boyfriend as I believe he is the love of my life, but at the same time I don't want this to come true and I don't know if I should listen to it or not. I have no idea why I think of a red car as my mom's is blue. It all seems so specific. Please help!
A.
These sorts of dreams can actually be a warning or premonition. They serve a good purpose as they can stop accidents or other tragedies from happening. Especially when it's a recurring dream, you should take note. Don't panic but just ask your Mom to take extra care when driving in that area. It doesn't matter what color her car is. Red is simply the color for danger in dreams as in waking life. You're right. This is a very specific dream. Regarding the angel, there's no way that one would make a threat to you like that or issue an ultimatum. You're projecting some sort of guilt onto the situation. Does your Mom not
like this guy? There's absolutely no reason to end your relationship. Dreams have a way of jumbling things up and that's why they're so confusing. The car and the relationship are two separate matters. Apart from warning your mother, try not to overthink this dream situation.
Cousin's Death
11 June, 2008
Q. When I was about 10, my five year old cousin died, and when it comes close to her death or something to do with her, I have dreams. I am 16 now and had a dream last night about my cousin. In it my brother says to my Mom, "it's a year ago tomorrow," but he never said what it was. I woke up just after I asked what it was and I could swear I heard my cousin say "Sam." I have a need to find out what happened a year ago but I don't know how to. I can ask my uncle and auntie if anything happened to them but what if something did and they don't want to talk or get upset.
A.
I think you're taking this way too literally. Dreams are more about symbols, ideas and messages than actual events. Sure, there have been many documented cases of dreamers seeing future events or experiencing all kinds of things they can't explain but in general, our dreams are just like food processors - they take the day's feelings, occurrences and thoughts then churn them all up. The result is a mish-mash, like a jigsaw puzzle but we don't always get to see the finished picture. I'm saying all this because you're obviously very worried. Although your cousin died in August, the anniversary mentioned in your dream could still be that of your cousin. As you say, you dream of her a lot, probably because she died at a very sensitive time of your childhood. Enjoy her visits and don't take it all too seriously.
Dream Soap Opera
28 May, 2008
Q. I have been having two recurring dreams but I didn't think much of them till I read your page. The first dream is that of someone that I love and care for so very much. The first problem is that I cannot see who they are. I recognize their voice when I hear it but don't know who it is. They tell me that they love me too but there is always some reason why we can't be together whether it be another person or another reason. This dream I have been having on and off for about a year. My second is a bit strange. I seem to be in trouble. I have been accused of a crime which I have not committed yet I am chased and arrested for but I always manage to escape. Each time I have the dream; it's almost like a story because the dream seems to move on a little further. Last time I had this dream, I escaped from a plane with the help of the mystery woman from my other dream and a group of soldiers who managed to get me away to a naval judge who was willing to listen to me so I could prove I had done nothing wrong. I was just about to start the conversation with him when my throat went dry and I could not speak This is when I woke up. I hope you can help explain my dreams as I am at a bit of a loss with them.
A.
I'll start with dream number two. Some dreams are like watching a movie. I've even had people writing to me about experiencing dreams in installments, like a soap opera! The subconscious mind is very creative. That's why dreams are endlessly fascinating. This dream seems to indicate either a guilty conscience or a feeling in your life that you are being victimized. Which do you think this is? Dreams help us to understand our emotions and behavior better so take whatever lesson is being offered. The first dream seems to speak of a longing for love or perhaps even a prediction of a woman entering your life. As both of these dreams keep recurring, they are definitely significant. Try to figure out the messages as only the dreamer can. I've given you some suggestions. Like a persistent child, these dreams won't stop until you heed them.
Grandad Calling
14 May, 2008
Q. Ever since I was little I have always had vivid dreams and have awoken and told my parents about them in pretty good detail. In the past 5 or so years I have become a lucid dreamer and can occasionally take control of them. Most of the time, however, I will just talk to my subconscious self or the people in my dream about how I know I am dreaming, and sometimes I will try to interpret my dream while still in it. The reason I am writing to you, however, is because 4 months ago my grandfather died. I have read that people can visit you in your dreams and I believe this happened. He came to me and the only thing he said was the nickname he had for me but when he said it, I felt something in the pit of my stomach that I had never felt before. I immediately started crying in my dream and in real life. He looked younger and healthier as well. Also, a few weeks ago, my other grandfather died and ever since that, every single night, I have been having dreams about him and with him in it. The only thing is, sometimes he doesn't look exactly like himself and he seems very distant. He doesn't talk either. With the dream with my first grandfather, I kind of sensed that it was really him but with my other grandfather (the one who just died), I feel like he can't break through yet. Do you think he is trying to get to me? For my first grandfather, he had cancer and we knew for a few weeks that he was terminally ill. For this grandfather, though, he was ill but he took an unexpected turn for the worse very suddenly. The dreams have been so vivid and it is really emotionally draining. Is there a way that I can get to him? Most of the time, I am not lucid in these dreams but is there a way I can become lucid? I am usually good at analyzing simple dreams but this is just really difficult. I know it has to do with closure and I actually feel blessed to have the dreams that I do but it has gotten to the point where they need to take a turn for the better now. Also, are our loved ones ever out of our reach or can we always summon them in our dreams?
A.
Lucid dreaming is really interesting. You seem to have a very clear grasp of dreams and how they work so I will just comment on your recent dream about your grandfather. I personally do believe that dead loved ones reach out to us in dreams and I think your theory is right about your second granddad. He seems disoriented and confused. Spiritualists would say he hasn't crossed over properly. This apparently occurs after a sudden death. Yet he's visiting you. He must love you a lot. I don't think it's anything to be concerned about as the dreams of him will undoubtedly change with time or stop altogether. Lucid dreaming is an effective tool to use in dream therapy as such. You can meditate before going to sleep or simply ask your inner guide to help you see your grandfather in a more positive light. You can't totally control your nocturnal experiences but you might have more restful sleep and be less worried. Give it a try.
School Daze
7 May, 2008
Q. I am back in high school and going to a PE class. One of my friends asked me to ditch with her. I say yes and she walks close to me so as to not let other teachers see her. She holds my hand as we walk away from campus. We get stopped by a teacher and he asked us for our IDs. We show the IDs to him and he says, "back to class!" We pretend like we are walking to class but still manage to leave school, holding hands. Then I wake up. I will also mention that I have a girlfriend and am pretty happy. This girl, in the dream, was a high school friend that I had a HUGE crush on. Still to this day, I find her attractive and interesting. There is always a "what if" when it comes to her. In high school, it somehow slipped that I liked her, like someone told her or something. She was very distant at times. But in college, when she found out I had a girlfriend, we would talk during lunch as she seemed to feel more comfortable with me. But now, a few years later, she's in my dreams. What does that mean? Thank you in advance.
A.
This dream relates directly to the unresolved desire you've had for this girl. It took you back to the setting in which you had the feelings. Dreams of the past always indicate nostalgia for a time that was or you wish had been. Everything that occurred in the dream is what you wish had really happened, especially the hand-holding. Why do you think you've had this dream recently? Have you been thinking about her? When she was a bit friendlier in college, you got your hopes up again. But you need to decide if you are happy with your current relationship or still want to live out your fantasy about this girl from your past? Your dream is giving you the opportunity to release this issue once and for all. It's up to you what you do about it.
Love The One You Hate
30 April, 2008
Q. I've been having dreams about this guy. During Christmas break he had asked me out and I had told him "yes" but 3 days later I wanted to think things over so we broke up because I didn't like him "that way". I have had 3 dreams about him. The first one was that I standing there and he just comes out of nowhere and kisses me, starts laughing and goes back to talking to his friends. The second one was that me and him were playing around in some place and I fell on the ground and then he tries to get me up but instead I pull him down and then we kissed. And the third one was that he had texted me saying "I'm nobody to you, YUP YUP". I don't know why I keep dreaming with him when I don't like him like that but I would like to know if you could tell me something about these dreams.
A.
Are you sure you don't secretly like him? Sometimes we keep feelings even from ourselves. But dreams allow no hiding places. All our secrets are revealed. So, rather than dismissing the possibility out of hand, stop, and just give it a little thought. Of course there may be other reasons for your dreams. One other idea I had is that you could be dreaming about this guy because you were uncertain about him at the start and had mixed feelings. He may still like you. The whole matter has been left unresolved which is one of the main functions of dreams - to settle things. If you can't talk it over with the guy then just be honest about your own feelings and let the dreams release what they need to in the meantime.
Pregnant?
23 April, 2008
Q. I am 20 years old and over the past three nights I have had dreams involving pregnancy. In my first dream, my mother was pregnant. My second dream was about a friend of mine that is pregnant and she was having her baby. And in my third dream someone close to me in the dream was pregnant but I couldn't tell who it was. Other than having all those things in common, nothing else was out of the ordinary. My boyfriend and I had unprotected sex at short while ago. Is it possible my body is telling me I'm pregnant or am I reading too much into the dreams?
A.
This is a series of recurring dreams even though, as you say, they're not identical. Themes can be just as potent as dream messages. I think you are having all these dreams about pregnancy because you're thinking about it so much and worrying about the possibility of being pregnant yourself. Dreams often just reflect our most persistent thoughts. These dreams will keep recurring until you either check out if you are indeed pregnant or stop wondering about it. The simplest solution would be to take a pregnancy test or see your doctor.
Lost Car
16 April, 2008
Q. I would really appreciate if you could give us an explanation as to my husband's dream. It has been bothering him, as he wakes up upset and mad. He has been dreaming about his car being lost and not being able to find it. It could be our own car (2005 Chevy Montana) or any other car. Sometimes he parks it in a lot, side street or highway and when he is ready to get it, he cannot find it.
A.
Some dreams are very tricky to interpret, some impossible. Your husband's is one of the easy ones, I'm glad to say. A car in a dream is the dreamer - it's just as simple as that. So, your husband is lost. He can't find himself. If he's dreaming it a few times, then the message is clear. He needs to do some work in this direction. It could be an emotional issue, work-related or a lack of future direction. My opinion is the last one because the car's left all over the place, giving a sense of confusion. He will continue to wake up upset if he doesn't deal with it. Please pass on my suggestions.
The Boy That Won't Go Away
9 April, 2008
Q. I have been having recurring dreams for the past month about this boy that I like. There was a point in time where we both liked each other - and I don't know what's happened from there. I still think about him all the time and still do have feelings for him but in one dream, he was yelling at a friend and me about how we were so mean (and since then I have lost that friend). But a dream I had last night; I was at a musical, and he just showed up out of nowhere and when I followed him outside, he was playing a guitar for money, and then he just left. As I questioned him leaving, he allowed me to follow and then my dream just ended. I've had a few more dreams like this where he would be in one place and something would happen between him and me - and then my dream would end. Do these dreams mean anything?
A.
Dreams always have meaning, just not necessarily what we think. The bit about losing your friend certainly seems to have been an accurate forecast. Perhaps this guy does think that you and your friend were mean. I think you're dreaming of him because things are unresolved between you. You're puzzled about why the friendship went nowhere. The most recent dream seems to be saying there's interest from him for you as well so could you try to strike up a conversation, be pleasanter when you next see him? If the dreams are steering you in that direction, it should work. Otherwise, they will continue recurring.
Shattered Childhood
2 April, 2008
Q. I hope you can help me with this dream because it upset me at the time. I dreamt that both my mother and I were watching myself as a child and were in the same room as me, the child, but did not speak to her. Two things upset me at the time, one was watching myself being stabbed in the chest and the other was of me being sexually abused. In the dream my Mom said, "Oh no," and I said to her, "I can't remember that ever happening" (which, by the way, never happened in real life). I did feel upset when I woke up.
A.
This is a very psychological dream. I do a lot of inner child work with my counseling clients and in a way, your dream is like an inner child meditation which is used for healing childhood hurts. The fact that your mother was also present makes it even more significant because she was obviously a key player in your childhood. Two rather ugly things happened in the dream room and they undoubtedly represent old wounds, particularly being stabbed in the chest which signifies emotional pain. Don't get lost in the fact that the dream events are not authentic. Something from the distant past needed to be released and this dream has achieved that. What a superb gift you've received. If you ever have a similar dream again, try to speak to your little girl as she's always inside you and would love to be comforted and connected with.
Dreams Of Mom
19 March, 2008
Q. I am wondering if you can help me interpret a recurring dream that I have had. My mother passed away about 8 months ago rather suddenly. My parents were married for almost 41 years and within 6 months my father met someone new and is engaged. This is my dream: My mother is there with my father doing normal family things. I am the only one there and it's more like I am in the air observing them. In each dream my parents are talking about taking a trip and my father's fiancée's name comes up. They finish what they are doing and then get in the car and go. I am guessing that it's just me wanting to see my mother one last time in her "normalcy" (she was in the hospital the last week of her life). However, the fact that it's almost like my father has to choose between his fiancée and my mother is sticking out. Any insight you could provide would be good!
A. I get a lot of letters about dreamers being visited by dead loved ones. Generally, the message is much the same, with slight variations. Reasonably, we all want to find a way to say goodbye, to let go and have closure. I think your theory is basically right. As your mother died in hospital, your inner mind is connecting with her as you knew and loved her, just doing normal, everyday things. However, the fact that this dream is recurring tells me there's more to it and I think it's to do with your father moving on with another woman. Whether you know it or not, there's a part of you that resents this as you naturally favor your mother. Your dream even depicts this precisely. Make peace with the loss of your mother and your father's new love so that you need not have this dream any longer.
Weird And Scary
12 March, 2008
Q. I had a disturbing dream about being pregnant and then vomiting up the organs of my baby. This was really weird and scary. What does this mean?
A. I wish I knew more details about you such as your age, if you have actually had a baby and so on. This is certainly an upsetting dream and my first impression of it is a fear of childbirth, or perhaps more specifically, a concern for the safety and health of any babies you might have. Of course it you were really pregnant, the dream would have more clear meaning. If you're worried that this might be a real event from the future, I'd say just take extra precautions when you're pregnant whenever and don't be overly-anxious in the meantime. Dreams can foretell the future but are not necessarily reality.
Grandpa's Ghost
5 March, 2008
Q. Can you please answer this? I had a dream that my deceased grandfather comes and talks to me while we are getting ready to go somewhere. He shows me his shirts he is wearing. And after that I get up
A. I probably get more dreams about dead loved ones than any other theme. It's one of the best, most important functions of dream-life - to help us heal our pain after a serious loss. The story details may vary but the purpose is always the same. So it is with your dream. Not only do we want to be comforted, we also need to make sense of a death. Whether your grandfather's spirit is actually visiting you in the dream or your inner mind conjured him, your dream is telling you that he's okay. The mundane details of dressing, shorts and going out are simply present to make the message accessible to you.
Best Friend's Brother
27 February, 2008
Q. I had a dream that I had sex with my best friend's brother! And it wasn't the first time, I've had dreams like this before!
A. If this were a one-off dream, I'd advise you to take no notice. But if, as you say, you have had this dream before, it suggests that you have feelings for this guy. You may not even know it yourself but dreams have a way of revealing our innermost secrets. It's up to you what you want to do about it but I daresay you'll keep having the dream if you just ignore it. It's not necessarily about having sex - that's just a symbol of romantic interest. Is the guy free? If so, give it a go.
Black Spiders
20 February, 2008
Q. I've dreamt of small black spiders around me climbing on my bed, however none came near me to hurt me. Another dream concerns a very large, like half the size of my bed, black spider. However it could not touch me to hurt me. I've seen spiders falling on one single web, like a string, many small ones falling from above. I have these often and I have no idea what it means. I stopped sleeping in my bed, just to be on the safe side. Thanks for your help in this vision of black spiders.
A. There are two main interpretations to dreams of spiders. Many standard dream dictionaries say that spiders mean money luck. Taking that meaning, the large spiders would seem to represent some major financial benefits while the many tiny insects a number of smaller windfalls. I hope this is the case with your dreams, especially if they're recurring. Make sure to buy some lottery tickets and put yourself in the way of every opportunity that will bring you extra money. Of course, if you have a spider phobia, then these would essentially be
nightmares but as you don't mention being afraid or waking up distressed, this second possibility seems less likely. Let's hope it's the money. There's nothing to be afraid of either way. It's unlikely to be about actual spiders. You're safe to sleep in your bed.
Trail of Tears
13 February, 2008
Q. For about 1 or 2 years now I've been having a dream about this lady from the Navajo "Trail of Tears" but I don't know who she is and I didn't know that it was about her in the trail of tears till I watched it last night with my parents. I looked it up on Google but then I clicked images and this lady on the first page popped up and she looks just like the girl from my dreams.
In my dream all it does is show her then I wake up.
A. It's possible that you have seen or read something about this lady but forgot. The imagery became internalized in your subconscious and then turned up in your dreams. That's how it works sometimes. I don't think you could've just conjured her up out of your imagination. This seems to be borne out by the fact that she just appeared without words or actions. If there was supposed to be a message attached to these dreams, you would probably have had more material to work with. Still, they did recur for 2 years so maybe they are trying to convey a general point to you. Could it be to do with sadness? Have you any special interest or connection with Native American culture? If you feel that this mythical woman has special significance for any reason, try to adapt it to your life. Do some research online and see what else you can find out.
Message From Spirit Guide
6 February, 2008
Q. I don't understand what my spirit guide told me last night. She said; "be anything but mad, time is short, you'll be leaving soon." Can you help me understand this?
A. I'm not clear what you mean by hearing from your spirit guide - do you mean in a dream? As to the message, it does sound as if he/she is saying you won't live to an old age but it's best not to take spiritual messages too literally as they are sometimes just intended to
make us think; in this case, about the importance of making the most of the time we have. When we hear a specific and clear message, it's a very valuable gift and we should always take heed. The "mad" probably means angry rather than crazy so perhaps the meaning of your dream is to mellow out. Think it through and see how it pertains to your life.
Husband On The Other Side
30 January, 2008
Q. My late husband appeared in a recent dream - I was yelling at him, in his face so to speak... he just stood there and took it. He knew he had screwed up and deserved my anger and disappointment in him. A little background is that my husband passed away in April of this year due to complications of chemotherapy. It was a very shocking moment to discover my best friend dead, in our back yard... even more shocking to realize that he did not leave me any life insurance money as he had told me he had done. I don't even believe that he loved me. I have discovered many BIG lies that my husband told me but I did not discover the lies until after his death. Before he died I thought he was perfect. After he died I realized he was a selfish lying coward. Now I have no respect for him and am very angry that he left me with so much debt and absolutely no means to pay. Also he won't let me email any perspective "mates". Every time I try to do so, something happens... from my computer completely crashing in the midst of the email to my not receiving their response email for no explainable reason. I swear it has to be my husband because these things have never happened before. I'm very computer/internet savvy and even I can't come up with any plausible reason for these random events to have occurred. I would love your input.
A. I'll deal with each matter separately. Firstly, one of the main functions of dreaming is to release deep emotions and resolve conflict. When it comes to dead loved ones, the need is even greater as we have no other way to communicate with them. I'm sorry about all the problems you've had to face since your husband's death but abusing him through a dream is a very healthy way to release your anger and bitterness. So, see that as a real positive. As to the computer glitches, psychic energy from spirits can cause electrical disturbances but then, so can negative energy from dark emotions. I don't expect you to forgive your husband right now but try to tone down the anger a bit and it should stop the problems.
Co-Worker Dreams
23 January, 2008
Q. I was really good friends with a co-worker for a year. We decided to be more then friends. That was fine until he decided to listen to a girl he liked over me. Now we aren't friends and don't talk. I've had three dreams with him in it, and in each one the sun was shining. The first one I was at home with my family, I walk to the door that leads outside to the backyard to see the friend and my sister sitting on the back porch. He looks at me with a content look (he has never been inside my house, let alone in my backyard). Then he is walking through the front yard to leave, he has his back towards me and I push at him, feeling hurt when I did so. He turned his head to look at me and was saying something, but I couldn't hear him. The sun was setting by this time. The second one, I'm standing in front of the store where we both work, he has two jobs so he is in that work's uniform. He is walking down the parking lot, towards the store, headed straight for me. The sun was shining in this dream as well. But, before he even gets close, I wake up. What does this mean? Am I regretting pushing him out of my life?
A. You could be. You don't offer any details as to why you actually finished with him. Maybe it still feels like unfinished business to you. That's usually why we have dreams of the past. I'm interested in the fact that the sun was shining. This tells me that somewhere in your mind you associate a happy situation with this guy. Also, as he was in your home, in the backyard which implies familiarity and he looks cozy. When you push at him, you're expressing the anger that you obviously felt when he let you down. If you've had dreams about this man three times, it's definitely troubling you. I suggest you contact him, not necessarily to resume a relationship but just to make peace.
Abuse Nightmares
16 January, 2008
Q. I was sexually abused by my father when I was 8 until I was 11 and I often have dreams about him being mean to me. He was not the most affectionate person when he was alive towards me.
For three nights in a row recently, I had awful nightmares of him beating me up. In these and all dreams with him in them, one specific sister is almost always in it verbally berating me.
Can you try to interpret? I have had horrific nightmares for years. How can I stop them?
A. It's easy to see why you have all these awful dreams. You are still suffering from the trauma of childhood sexual abuse. Until you get professional help to release these old problems, you will continue to experience the dreams. Dreams alert us to suppressed feelings, hurts, fears, anxieties and so on. The fact that they're getting more intense and frequent tells me your psyche is pushing for some urgent attention. It can only get worse if you ignore this message. Maybe a part of you remembers or thinks your sister was somehow responsible for your abuse or maybe she escaped your father's attentions. Her presence in your dreams is not a coincidence. Nightmares, especially if recurring, are always a sign of a troubled mind. Do talk to someone about the past and give your mind a rest.
Dreams Of Ex
9 January, 2008
Q. I keep having dreams of my ex-boyfriend. In my dream, the places are never the same but in every dream, my ex comes to me. I see him clearly, he holds my hand and tells me he loves me, smiles at me and says everything will be okay between us, that we will be together again. It's always his voice and I always remember what he has actually said to me when I wake up. It feels like I have had that conversation with him in real life. That's how real the dream is. Can you help figure this dream out for me and what it means, please.
A. Very precise and clear dreams like these are usually significant. They can mean two different things. First, do you still hanker after this relationship? If you do, that would explain the recurring dream. It describes what you would like to actually happen. The other possibility is that your ex is sending you "vibes" through your dreams and he in fact does want you back. He might be thinking about you a lot. Is there any way to get in touch with him? That's the only way you'll find out for sure how he feels. You can make contact without saying anything about the dreams as such; just see how the land lies. If it's you holding on, try to resolve your feelings so the dreams can stop.
Husband Cheating?
2 January, 2008
Q. I am 28 years old and 4 months pregnant and have for 2 nights in a row had a dream that my hubby told me he was involved with another woman and felt confused. He was telling me it as if I shouldn't be upset. My boyfriend would never cheat, it's just not him. He also loves me very much and is very happy with our relationship. What does this dream mean? We are sitting in the living room when he tells me this. Please get back to me. Thanks a lot.
A. I'm not going to lie to you and say that this dream is coming from your imagination. Dreams can be totally fantasy, spun like cobwebs out of fear and anxiety but as you've had yours more than once, there could be some truth to it. It's obviously scaring you so I suggest you ask your husband straight out. Women's intuition is very powerful and you'll know if he's telling the truth. If he is, then please put these fears and doubts out of your mind or you'll continue to have upsetting dreams. You know when you're pregnant; your emotions can be a bit topsy-turvy so that's another possibility with these dreams. Sort out which one it is then let it go. If the dream is a true warning, you're better off knowing the truth.
Dreamy Affair
19 December, 2007
Q. I am a happily married woman and have been for 3 years and we have a beautiful daughter. I started engaging in conversation with this guy at work and yes, he is attractive, but lately I've been dreaming about him and in my dreams, I'm married to my husband but in a relationship with this guy. I know for a fact I would never cheat on my husband as he means too much to me, but in these dreams, this guy even has a friendly relationship with my daughter. Should I be concerned or aware of something?
A. This is what we call "wish-fulfillment." It can be brought on by a true desire or merely a fantasy. In your dream, I think it's the second category. You're happily married but you're not dead! You're allowed to fantasize and flirt with other guys as long as you have strict boundaries of appropriateness. You're attracted to this man at work so it's coming out in your dream. It doesn't mean you want to have an affair or anything like that. There's no reason to worry. Dreams are only impressions, not reality.
More of Charmaine's dream interpretations...
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